Tuesday, July 15, 2025
From Folklore to Film: The Unholy Truth Behind Nosferatu
Monday, July 14, 2025
7 INCHES OF COSMIC MENACE: THE GRIMALDI ACTION FIGURE IS HERE
YOUR PATH TO DAMNATION STARTS HERE, EARTHIE
THE SPACE MONSTERS GLOW-UP (WARNING: IRREVERSIBLE)
Saturday, July 12, 2025
Click-Order Terror Awaits You At Oblivion
INCOMING TRANSMISSION....COMMLINK ESTABLISHED...
"YOUR PATH TO DAMNATION STARTS HERE, EARTHIE. 🔥
The Oblivion Trading Post just stocked three unholy relics that'll corrupt your shelves, warp your walls, and melt your mind—but only if you're brave (or stupid) enough to click 'order.'
💀 SPACE MONSTERS #1 – The magazine so brutal, it makes Tales from the Crypt look like Barney. Your therapist warned you about this.
🌌 DARK MATTER PROJECTOR – Bathe your lair in cosmic horror hues (and possibly unlock a gateway to the void). Who needs sunlight when you’ve got eldritch glow?
🔪 HOOKER WITH A HACKSAW – Pretty Woman meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre. Julia Roberts could never.
STOCK IS VANISHING FASTER THAN BUCANEER BUNNY'S DIGNITY.
👉 CLAIM YOUR DOOM 👈
End Transmission
🔗 Join the Cult: www.obliviontradingpost.com
#OblivionTradingPost #SpaceMonsters #CosmicHorror #GrindhouseGore
(P.S. If you don’t buy these, Buccaneer Bunny wins. And nobody wants that.)
Friday, July 11, 2025
YOUR PATH TO DAMNATION STARTS HERE, EARTHIE
Monday, July 7, 2025
Have an Anime Character Customized To Your Likeness
INCOMING TRANSMISSION....COMMLINK ESTABLISHED...
🚨 ATTENTION, EARTHLINGS & FUTURE PIRATE LORDS 🚨
The Blackjack Brigade is recruiting—but not for long. Your name. Your face. Your legacy. Immortalized in anime infamy... if you dare.
💀 TIERS OF TERROR:
DECKHAND ($250)
"Get plundered (literally)"
Early digital screener
Your name in the credits (tiny, near the catering list)
10% chance we misspell it
FIRST MATE ($300)
"Get famous (as cannon fodder)"
NPC Easter Egg (You’re the guy who screams "WE’RE ALL GONNA—" before exploding)
Space Monsters zine with your obituary
CAPTAIN ($2K)
"Get immortalized (then probably killed)"
Custom Wanted Poster (Last seen: On fire)
Leather eyepatch (Pre-stained with ‘animator tears’)
LAGOMORPH LEGEND ($5K)
"Get a funeral scene (and a line)"
Voiced cameo ("Tell my wife... I stole her water pod...")
IMDb credit (*"Voice Actor - ‘Doomed Crewman #3’"*)
FLEET ADMIRAL ($10K)
"Get rich (or die trying)"
👉 CLAIM YOUR PIRATE STATUS NOW 👈
https://obliviontradingpost.com/collections/blackjack-brigade-collection
(Or walk the plank of regret.)
End Transmission
🔗 Join the Mutiny: https://www.spacemonstersmagazine.com/
🔗 Surrender Your Wallet: https://obliviontradingpost.com/
#BlackjackBrigade #BuccaneerBunny #AnimeInvestor #SpaceMonstersMagazine
From Folklore to Film: The Unholy Truth Behind Nosferatu
INCOMING TRANSMISSION....COMMLINK ESTABLISHED... "ATTENTION, BLOODSUCKER ENTHUSIASTS & HISTORY NERDS! Elizabeth Belmont—vampire h...

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